Worst Major League Baseball Players of All-Time

Posted in Uncategorized by twinfan1 on January 25, 2013

Billy Beane 1984-1989 .246 career OBP- “Moneyball” was not subtitled “The Career of Billy Beane”

Tony Suck, 1883-1884 career on base percentage of .205, a career slugging percentage of .161, and zero home runs.

Eli Whiteside 2005, 2009-2012 just because. he’s so bad that Vera rented his boyhood bedroom to J.R. Phillips. ” I wanted a decent player in Eli’s bed”, Vera explained.

J.R. Phillips 1993-1999 The worst 23 HR hitter ever. And it took him 7 years to hit the 20 mark- hit .188 and K’d 180 times in 501 AB.

Tommy Lasorda, 1954-1956 6.48 ERA in 26 games over three seasons.

Marv Throneberry, 1955-1963 He once hit a triple, but was called out after missing both first and second base while on his way to third. Jimmy Breslin said: ” Having Marv Throneberry play for your team is like having Willie Sutton work for your bank.”

Mario Mendoza, 1974-1982 A guy whose name is the benchmark for hitting futility has to be on the list. Actually, Mario has been unfailrly maligned, he was .215 hitter. I think he deserves Eli’s bed.

Herb Washington, 1974-1975 Baseball’s only designated runner, he was 31 for 48. He was picked off in the ninth inning of Game 2 of the 1974 World Series, killing an Oakland rally and handing the Dodgers a victory. He never batted, never played in the field.

The Reverend Aloysius Stanislaus Travers, 1912 In his one major league appearance, Travers pitched a complete game, allowing 26 hits and 24 runs

Bill Bergen, 1901-1911 Bergen has the lowest career batting average of any player with 2,500 at bats. He hit .170 with two career home runs.

No post with Lasodra in it is complete without his major contribution to the game:

42 Responses

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snarkk said, on January 25, 2013 at 2:02 pm

Seems to me the Braves got the upper hand on the Upton deal. Their outfield is pretty impressive now on paper.
D-backs did get Prado, he’s a good player, but the others thrown in — I dunno.
Probably the best the Dbacks could do, Upton and Ariz management obviously had soured on each other…
Salty said, on January 25, 2013 at 2:22 pm

Good stuff, twinfan.
snarkk said, on January 25, 2013 at 2:39 pm

Gotta love the Herb Washington experiment. Charlie O would try anything.
BTW, here’s more on the Upton thing… http://tinyurl.com/akmxjx4
zumiee said, on January 25, 2013 at 3:52 pm

This guy belongs on the “worst” list in some way, if just for this play:
unca_chuck said, on January 25, 2013 at 4:12 pm

What about Cocky Rotz?

A player lost to the mists of time . . .

http://www.baseball-reference.com/minors/player.cgi?id=rotz–001coc
- Flavor said, on January 25, 2013 at 5:17 pm
  
  Chuck I actually spent about 5 minutes googling The Cockster yesterday after you posted the baseball-ref link. Couldn’t find a thing, not even a next of kin.
twinfan1 said, on January 25, 2013 at 4:41 pm

The Worst List is the Best List, so many to choose from.
xoot said, on January 25, 2013 at 5:35 pm

Tony LaRussa: 6 seasons as a middle infielder, 203 PAs, .199/.292/.250.
Chico said, on January 25, 2013 at 5:46 pm

Casey Blake just because I hate him. Wanna see the most epic beer commercial ever? http://ww.theinspiration.com/2011/09/carlsberg-stunt-in-cinema/
PawlieKokonuts said, on January 25, 2013 at 6:07 pm

Oh man, Twin, this thread is HOF stuff. How can one combine so many stats with such inane, vulgar hilarity with such skill so readily? I literally did laugh out loud. I also love xoot’s POTD.
- twinfan1 said, on January 25, 2013 at 7:10 pm
  
  Pawlie, my xFIP = ((13*(FB% * League-average HR/FB rate))+(3*(BB+HBP))-(2*K))/IP + constant, converted to the Inane, Vulgar Hilarity Scale is 3.05, an excellent motherfucking number, fuckwad 😉
PawlieKokonuts said, on January 25, 2013 at 7:21 pm

Apologies for the interruption, but I don’t see the Room B forum, so I’ll post this here, from Stephen King, on guns: http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/style-blog/wp/2013/01/25/stephen-king-releases-gun-control-essay/
- twinfan1 said, on January 25, 2013 at 7:37 pm
  
  I’ll put a new one up, look for it in a while.
blade3colorado said, on January 25, 2013 at 7:54 pm

Marv Throneberry, 1955-1963 He once hit a triple, but was called out after missing both first and second base while on his way to third. Jimmy Breslin said: ” Having Marv Throneberry play for your team is like having Willie Sutton work for your bank.”

LOL. Good post Twin, especially ol’ Marv. He seemed to always be in my bubble gum baseball card packs.
twinfan1 said, on January 25, 2013 at 9:11 pm

With the battle on again, I have a link to the “Page B” thread to the right, “Heller-acious decision…”
Macdog said, on January 25, 2013 at 11:21 pm

I didn’t make it through the entire list because I couldn’t stop laughing after seeing the name “Tony Suck.” I’ll try again tomorrow.
eddacker said, on January 26, 2013 at 6:20 am

I am bored. And I am not sure spring training will loosen that from my bones. This year’s hot stove seemed to start off all guns a-blazing’ and that was exciting. I, personally took some time. Then I took some more time studying the teams, prospects, etc.. I just re-watched Cain’s perfecto and that helped. I tried watching some college bowl games and lasted 10 minutes settling for scores and very few highlights. The niners clumsy win was the only pro game I have watched, until I found out the Ravens beat the Patriots, which I had recorded, so I then watched that. I will not be watching the Pro Bowl. I do cherish ST it is one of my passions. But I fear I am too far away to enjoy the nuance and subtleties that makes every-day baseball so great for a fan.

When it comes to worse ball player of all time I think of Pete Rose, and a pigs nose. He sucked.
Second on my list would be that midget guy they put in to draw a walk because his strike zone was so small.
Third would be Joe Morgan, not for his playing days but for his work in the booth. HATE the guy. His announcing career easily erases any pluses he may have had from his playing days. I would gladly give up anything he accomplished on the field to not have to listen to him as a colour guy.

Anyway, I wish I had never heard of baseball because right now baseball is causing me lots of anguish.
- Flavor said, on January 26, 2013 at 7:20 am
  
  Buck up, Edd. We’re down to 18 days. You’ll find the fire again for it just like all of us do, every year.
  - eddacker said, on January 26, 2013 at 7:55 am
    
    Actually, I just lost a dear friend to a sudden embolism
    one moment he was in the office – the next he was gone.
    and he was an As fan
    what’s a boy to do?
  - Flavor said, on January 26, 2013 at 8:41 am
    
    Sorry to hear about that.
  - unca_chuck said, on January 26, 2013 at 8:56 am
    
    Sorry to hear that, Edd. Hard to understand how random some things are.
Bozo said, on January 26, 2013 at 8:11 am

The Wurst?
Braves – Georgia Dog with slaw
Dbacks – Arizona Dog, Chorizo with Nacho cheese
Boston- Fenway Frank, Kayem dogs since 1909
Cubs – Chicago style (no other description needed)
White Sox- Italian sausage
Reds – The Cheese Coney
Colo – Rockie Dog, foot long with grilled peppers
Tigers- Coney Island, meat on meat, all meat chili on all beef dog
Stros – Smokey Joe, chili con carne with bacon
KC – Royal Blue Dog, Blue cheese and bacon bits
Angels – Halo Dog, with bacon and charro beans
Dodger – D Dog, foot long grilled or steamed
Milwaukee – Brewers Brat – klement’s sausage
Mets – Shack Cago Dog, from the Shake Shack
Yanks – Nathan’s Yankee dog
Phils – South Philly Dog, with broccoli and peppers
Pirates – Hot Italian
Pads – Sonoran Dog
Giants – (I haven’t tried this) Tres Agave Dog, bacon wrapped with chipolte sauce
Sea – SODO dog, 22″ for 22 bucks
Texas – Boomstick, 1lb with Texas Chili 26 bucks
Wash (Current favorite of mine) – Ben’s Half Smoke, half pork and beef dogs with Ben’s Chili Bowl chili.

Wait, you said worst. Never mind, I think I’ll make some chili.
- Alleykat said, on January 26, 2013 at 9:22 am
  
  Nice Menu Bozo..
  Say Bozo….What’s the red gooey stuff between an elephants toes?
  A slow clown…
  - Bozo said, on January 26, 2013 at 9:59 am
    
    Ouch!
- eddacker said, on January 26, 2013 at 9:44 am
  
  there is not much room between a worst and a wurst. For me it is Polish dogs – although I have never had them outside California. Here in the UK I have kabanos or a fatter sausage that goes well with sauerkraut.
  chilli? that is another story as I have had so many states’ best (meat and meatless) and my own recipe to judge by.
  - Bozo said, on January 26, 2013 at 10:00 am
    
    Edd, if you end up in DC one of these days I strongly recommend Ben’s Chili Bowl’s Half Smoked with chili.
- twinfan1 said, on January 26, 2013 at 11:38 am
  
  “South Philly Dog, with broccoli and peppers”…Thank God I researched this- it’s with Broccoli “Rabe”,roasted long hot peppers and shaved sharp provolone on seeded Italian bread.Which sounds totally delish…. I was having real probems with “regular” broccoli on a bun. Here’s the South Philly:
  - twinfan1 said, on January 26, 2013 at 11:42 am
    
    Here’s what I was having problems with:
  - Bozo said, on January 26, 2013 at 12:00 pm
    
    My bad.
  - twinfan1 said, on January 26, 2013 at 12:06 pm
    
    That South Philly has me making a grocery list for next week’s game. That’s on the menu…
unca_chuck said, on January 26, 2013 at 8:41 am

Speaking of Cocky Rotz, check out the Rhode Island school of design’s hockey mascot..

http://tinyurl.com/23ha26r

Criminy, watching the Aussie open and the women’s tennis sounds like a porn soundtrack.
eddacker said, on January 26, 2013 at 9:47 am

come on – Dick Trickle HAS to be the all time sports figure’s name . . . .
- Alleykat said, on January 26, 2013 at 10:51 am
  
  Rusty Kuntz….Always a knee slapper.Classic
  Besides who would really want to fuck a Rusty Kuntz?
  - twinfan1 said, on January 26, 2013 at 11:16 am
    
    Rusty: “I’m sick of this shit! It’s “Kooooontz” ! Got it? “Kooooontz” !!!!
Bozo said, on January 26, 2013 at 10:02 am

Don’t forget Dick Pole and Peter LaCock.
twinfan1 said, on January 26, 2013 at 10:24 am

OK- you guys have finally broken me. I’m out of the closet, so to speak.. Beat this list, you fellow juvenvile delinquents:
Rod Boxberger
Lavon Gash
Dick Bliss
Mark Beavers
Cumberland “Cum” Posey
Johnny Dickshot
Judge Fuchs
Buttercup Dickerson
Butts Wagner

And every porn ballteam needs a leader, some, uh, royalty… a captain, so I present the honorable Royce Pussington..
- Salty said, on January 26, 2013 at 11:03 am
  
  A little boost to your inane vulgar hilarity score? 😉
  - twinfan1 said, on January 26, 2013 at 11:12 am
    
    Hah!! You ain’t seen nuttin’ yet!
twinfan1 said, on January 26, 2013 at 11:13 am

And why? Why oh why did their parents do this to them? Ugly at birth? “By Jove, what will we name our darling girl, this newest Slivets? Hey, I’ve got it! We’ll call her ‘Assol’!
More from the Wide World of Sports…

Randy Raper

Chris Blewitt- no, he’s NOT the new Niner kicker, fergedddit..
.
Jumbo Cummings- he fought Smokin’ Joe

Craphonso Thorpe- Thorpe played for the Chiefs, Houston Texans, Detroit Lions, Indianapolis Colts, Jacksonville Jaguars, New York Giants, Tennessee Titans, Winnipeg Blue Bombers, New York Sentinels, Omaha Nighthawks and Tijuana Flats Black Magic. Took awhile, but verdict was delivered- he was crappy.

Charity Beaver-a personal trainer. No prob finding clients
- unca_chuck said, on January 26, 2013 at 3:31 pm
  
  Sounds like a Bond girl.
- unca_chuck said, on January 26, 2013 at 3:48 pm
  
  Sponsored by Dickens Cider.
blade3colorado said, on January 26, 2013 at 1:47 pm

New post on my blog 🙂